


Dear Sam

by livingwithmermaids



Series: Hinting At Something Different [55]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Episode: s10e03 Soul Survivor, Established Relationship, Fluffy-ish?, Letters, M/M, Mentions of Demon Dean, Soulmates, mentions of soulless sam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-18
Updated: 2015-06-18
Packaged: 2018-04-04 22:23:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4155180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/livingwithmermaids/pseuds/livingwithmermaids
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean wrote a letter to Sam while he was a demon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dear Sam

**Author's Note:**

> Season 10 episode 3 Soul Survivor
> 
> It's good to be back

Sam sighed as he studied Dean's jeans. They were filthy, like his brother hadn't changed them in a week, and considering who Dean was just twenty-four hours ago, Sam wouldn't be surprised if he really hadn't changed them at all. 

He dug his hands in the pockets, wrinkling his nose when he pulled out dirty napkins and candy wrappers. He slid his hand into the last pocket, preparing to feel a lollipop stick or a ketchup-covered napkin, when he felt paper. He pulled it out and furrowed his eyebrows.

The paper was stained with small drops of water and the ink was smeared across the page, but the handwriting was most definitely his brother's. Sam sat with crossed legs as he read the words.

_Dear Sam._

_Did you know demons could cry?_

Sam looked over the words again to make sure he read them correctly. He studied the stains on the paper again. Tears. They were tears. He continued reading.

_I've been a demon for exactly forty-eight hours, thirty-seven minutes, and twenty-six seconds. It's the strangest thing I've ever experienced, which is saying something._

_It's pretty great, all things considering. I feel alive. I can do whatever I want without worrying someone will freak the fuck out. Everything is clearer and closer. I imagine it's what you felt like when you were soulless._

Sam winced at the mention of him soulless. He'd only met his soulless self for a few minutes, and had heard stories about him, and he sounded like the king of all douches. Dean always seemed sad at the mention of him. He sighed.

_Although, I'm not as big of a douche as you were. Even if I am more bloodthirsty._

Sam almost chuckled.

_The thing is... I don't really have the urge to physically hurt you. Isn't that weird?_

Sam automatically looked in the direction of their bed, where Dean remained fast asleep. It made Sam's heart feel a little bit lighter, like Dean didn't really think he was evil like he thought he was.

_I wouldn't save you if you got hurt or anything. And just the idea of breaking you with words makes me excited. But I don't want to look for you and kill you. Not unless I feel like you deserve it._

Memories of Dean with a cruel smile on his face and a hammer in his hands flashed through his mind. He shivered. 

_I really don't know if that's normal or not. I don't know if it's normal for demons to write letters to their brothers that they'll get to see again. I just know that everything is simple. And that's okay, even though I feel like something's missing. I feel like I lost something besides my humanity, and my soul, and my morals, and everything else. I feel like somebody scooped out a piece of me and threw it so far that an angel couldn't find it._

_Freaky, huh?_

 

_Sincerely, Dean_

Sam blinked as tears started gathering in his eyes. He stood and watched as his brother slept, the blanket rising with his breaths.  He leaned over Dean and smoothed Dean's sweaty hair down.

 

He made sure to burn the letter while Dean was still asleep.

 

 

 


End file.
